Thursday, November 11, 2010

Sources of Gravity

Thursday afternoon I was outdoors having a picnic, enjoying what was truly a splendid day of Indian summer. Laying in the shade, yet feeling the rays of sunlight on my face, it was the perfect combination of tranquility. The day ended up being nestled in, falling asleep to the sound of the shower of autumn leaves landing on the ground. Waking to the view of clouds passing by. And drifting back to sleep to the melody of nature. Contentment and peace easily put this nap into the top five all time best naps, ever. The feeling of bliss easily bumps it up a few more to the top three …

While I was napping, I was thinking about the beauty of nature. The ying to the yang of our universe that delivers such amazing joys as sunshine, the heat from a lighting strike, the feeling of a breeze on your skin. Proven theories, science projects, blue ribbons at the county fairs all make way to discovery of the facts of our world; the science to our existence. Within that existence there are givens – oil and water don’t and won’t mix, E=MC2, and gravity is the force of our lives.

Gravity. A intricate part of nature, science, our very being on this planet is based in part because of it. The same science applies when it comes to love. Just a theory to some, but a proven fact of life to others. Sometimes we find individuals that no matter our words or actions, we are compelled like a force of gravity to be pulled towards them. Sometimes in the physical sense, others in purely emotional components. Do your best to fracas against, it’s a battle you are guaranteed to lose. You cannot fight science. You cannot fight purity. You cannot fight love.

I should know. I fought love. I fought gravity. And I lost.

Recently, I came face to face with my very own physical form of gravity, and like a magnetic force of energy, I was compelled into a spiral down. Excitement, confusion, uncertainty – I was a whirlwind of emotions as strong as the force itself. This gravity is like “home” to my heart. Time stops, knowing no bounds. My gravity is a combination of perfection and bliss, but comes at a price of heartache and pain.

And for a few weeks I have been in heartache and pain. Lost – uncertain about the future. Plans that I seem to have made no longer are possible, yet fragments remain of what could have been … leading to further sadness.

Yet – in that sadness, there is a great healing.

I was enlightened to a theory of my very own: Although gravity is science, it’s also a daily part of our lives that exists and works without us paying it much attention. Days come in, days leave, gravity is working and we hardly even notice. The same comes to your own force fields in life – they can still be a part of your life that you give much credit to for allowing you to be the person you are, respecting them for the gifts they have given to your life, but then making them a distant memory as you live your life – pulled by their force, but living as if you don’t even realize it’s there.

This Thursday afternoon, as I lay there, happier than I have been in quite some time, I knew my gravity was still working. But I also knew there was another force gaining strength – reconciliation. Allowing other forces in your world to be noticed gives such an amazing gift … an afternoon of sunlight on your face, a smile from the inside out, and a feeling of elation as strong as gravity itself.